November 30, 2015
Sometimes other people can be harsh. They can be judgmental and say things that make me say, "Dude, why?" Do we truly understand that none of us are perfect? Like haha we are all just trying our little hearts out. Trying to be the best versions of ourselves. I have been here for 4 months and I still don`t know a lot. Ha I am not the best teacher, the best with Spanish, or knowing what to do or say. But the more we focus on what we can`t do the more IMPOSSIBLE life is going to feel. I like to focus on the little things. I can give up my seat on the bus to a woman and her tiny baby. I can carry my companions bag when we are going up a steep hill. We can buy roses and hand them out to people on the street. We make really really buttery cookies and give them to the Bishop and Relief Society president and their families (actually that might not have been service because they tasted so bad). But the point is that it`s the little things we do that make the big differences. I find myself during the day thinking "Oh no, what would the other missionaries do in this situation? Or what would President do?" When in reality the only person I should be thinking about is "What would Jesus do.. What would he really do?"
I wrote in the front of my planner, "What kind of missionary does my mom think I am?" I know that if I am the missionary my mom thinks I am and can be then I am doing just as Jesus would do. He stops for the one. This week my companion and I pushed an old lady in a wheel chair up a giant hill. At first I was like my CALVES ARE ON FIRE I CAN`T DO THIS ANYMORE! I was thinking about me. This hurts me. I am tired. I am hungry. I miss my family. I want to be home for Christmas. I want turkey on Thanksgiving. WA WA WA WA!! It was all about me. But then I looked at the face of this cute little old lady who I tried so hard to understand but she had about 3 teeth, but with those 3 teeth she had the biggest smile on her face. In that moment all the mean comments people make, all the homesick feelings, and Ugh I just want DORITOS or PIZZA feelings went away.
So what would Jesus do? What would he really really do? Now get off your toosh and do it! Stop for the ONE! Make cookies for your neighbor just because. Write your bishop a letter and say thank you!! Tell the lady bagging your groceries to have a freaking awesome day!!! It`s the little tiny things we do that make the biggest difference to God.
I promise with all my freaking heart that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! But there are people out there who might feel alone. So STOP thinking about yourself and start thinking about what Jesus, the person who has endured ALL and still loves, the person who`s love for us is on the palms of his hands. What would he do?